Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Friendship



I was brainstorming with a friend today about what I should blog about. Some days are so easy and other days things just don't pour out.  It's not that I have a loss of things to say, more that I'm unsure about delving into certain topics or that I don't feel I can articulate my thoughts properly.  So, some things I stay away from verbally.

I'm writing early because I have a dinner date with Bailey :-) and I know I'll be too tired when I get home.  It's actually not even dark out yet.  

I'm fortunate to have a lot of pictures of Chris and his friends.  He had a lot of buddies both male and female.  I'm proud he was a popular kid.  He wasn't arrogant, I doubt anyone would ever use that adjective to describe him - he was just a likable guy.  Chris was everyone's friend and that's pretty cool.  He was happy-go-lucky.

I got cards and e-mails and texts from the parents and grandparents of some of Christopher's friends after he passed.  I will treasure them, thank you.  They sent me pictures of Chris that I have never seen before.  I know that these wonderful people went digging through their photo albums just for me.  To share some pictures that were taken that I was unaware of.  How kind!  I'm sure you probably have oodles of photos too, ones that were never shared with the others that are in them.  It's not on purpose of course, it just happens. How could any of us remember to always pass them on?  For me to receive the photos now are priceless.  Such new and fabulous treasures!

Of course in most all the pictures Chris is smiling, what else is new?  He thoroughly enjoyed himself so long as he was with people.  Chris used to go visit friends and if they weren't home he thought nothing of hanging out with the parents or his friends siblings.  It happened quite often.  

I've had parents thank me for the help Chris provided with hanging up Christmas decorations, securing Halloween cornstalks to the front lamp post, changing flat tires, digging post holes, dragging out summer patio furniture from the basement, emergency babysitting, etc.  It never fazed Chris if something was asked of him.  He'd shrug and jump in.  He did the same for me.  I will say he wasn't the brightest bulb and many times he wouldn't just outwardly notice something needed doing but he was never put off if it was requested of him.
Chris had such a wide variety of friends. Besides his football brothers whom I've mentioned before there are friends such as, Patrick; he never played any sports yet he and Chris went everywhere together.  When Chris had practice off he'd go and then he and Pat would catch up when he was done.  

Tyler and Connor; they played baseball and Chris would hitch a ride with their parents and go spend all day at the field with them.  He also went on plenty of family outings with various families and never seemed to lack an invitation somewhere.  He was rarely home for long.

I thought it might be nice to share some random photos and let everyone know how very much I appreciate their embracing of Chris.  It means so much to know how well loved he was.  It's no wonder he enjoyed school and being out and about, he was never at a loss for someone to talk to or something to do. 











I've been told he was a very good listener.  Encouraging when someone was down or struggling and usually had some sort of words to life the spirits,  Rachel; she sent me a really great text telling me how Chris used to cheer her up at school when she was having a bad day.  That's a beautiful thing for me to hear now that Chris has passed.  I love hearing more and more about his personality and the sides of him I didn't get to see when he was away from home.
Thanks SHEN students, parents and extended families for all you've shared with me.  Don't be shy in continuing to do so, it's what we have in common and I'm all for listening in regard to my son.   You help me keep him alive with your kind and funny words and stories and I know others enjoy hearing about his personality, his kindness, wit and silly antics :-)

Thank you for reading.

11 comments:

  1. Regina,

    Great post and great pictures! I haven't had the time to post in a couple of days, but I do read every day.

    You continue to awe and inspire me! I love the photos! Oh wait, did I already say that?...LOL I LOVE them!

    I have said it before and I will say it again, Chris is the kid he is because of the influence you his mom had on him!

    I do believe if I ever had met the two of you I would think "he IS his mothers' son!"

    God Bless, XO

    PS. I felt like i had spent the day with your Christopher all day yesterday. I am running a winter break camp and a 4-1/2 yr old came with mom to drop his sister off. He ended up staying, he looks just like Chris looked now(not like his baby pictures) He was a solid boy very coordinated and just an absolute joy. I even mentioned to the counselor working, that little boy reminds me of a little Chris Stewart from the picture I have seen and the blog. She said she thought the exact same thing. Being a teacher I see your Chris in a lot of students and i think in my head...Hi Chris, go visit your mom and Bailey, they miss you... I ended the evening by meeting your brother...the picture you use in every blog, Chris's profile...well he is a Yakel for sure, because Chris's profile looks exactly like his uncles. (I did not mention Chris or this blog, I simply just silently took it all in :) )

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    1. PS,again... Beautiful picture of Chris and Fallon from Shakers prom last year! She is a great kid too and an amazing friend to Bailey Wind!(she was in my second grade faith formation class and she has not changed one bit, just a beautiful person inside and out! <3)If you are reading this Fallon...you are a great kid!! I just thought I'd let you know we notice your goodness!!!!

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    2. Annie...Fallon Buckley, right? I kept looking at the picture thinking I know this girl from some where! She went to Forts Ferry with my son, Connor!

      So Fallon if you are reading...Hi from Mrs. Sheriff!! :)

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  2. Regina,
    I hope you and Bailey had a wonderful dinner. I wish I would've known Chris personally it would have been an honor. I feel like I am getting to know him through your blogs and he is a son that you can be so very proud of. You raised one heck of a young man. Thank you and God bless

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  3. I laughed a little when you were talking about how many friends Chris has. I didn't laugh in the sarcastic sense, but more in the *facepalm* sense of "MY GOODNESS WHAT IS THERE NOT TO LIKE?" This post made me smile and makes me appreciate my friends a little more. Chris and I are different here in while, yes, I have a toe in every pond, I wouldn't consider all of those people my friends. I have my little tiny group of girls I go too, just three of them, and those are my true friends. Different strokes for different folks. However, in times like these, I breathe a sigh of relief because although that many more people are hurting, there are that many more people to support each other and you throughout this journey.

    And, I hope your dinner with Bailey was splendid.

    Lots of love.

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  4. Regina,

    I loved the pictures and I like hearing that people went out of their way to find pictures of Chris with their sons or daughters to send to you. Like you said, fabulous treasures. Chris having so many friends, and so many experiences with these friends, and their families, is part of his amazing 100%. He so lovingly touched so many lives and I really like that those experiences are being shared with you.

    It's amazing to me that there are kids out there that have such busy social lives, especially the ones that do all the sports. It makes sense, because as a team, they become friends and share so much. just don't know how they fit it all in!

    Ally and I have this conversation about friendships very often, this past weekend was the most recent actually! She and I went to the movies and it tugged at my heart strings to see the *groups of kids* from her school, at the same mall, all obviously there together, and yet again Ally was at the movies with me. Ally is in a unique situation that most of her friends, that have a lot in common with her, do not live here or go to school with her. It makes me feel bad that she doesn't have the "typical high school relationships" and come graduation, I think she'll miss some of the teachers, more than the kids. She has one or two good friends, but the rest of those "kid experiences" are lost on her. The sleepovers don't happen, the party invites don't happen, the trips to the malls don't happen... The pictures I have of her with friends are few. The pictures I do have plenty of, I have are her in a kilt or with multiple older people who she considers friends. Her daily relationships are unfortunately not person to person interactions with her friends because they live so far away. She tells me over and over again, because I worry, that she's happy and she has good friends, unfortunately not "normal" day to day interaction based friendships. It's just not the way it is for her. Her 1st long term boyfriend (1 year) lived in Red Hook! Talk about difficult. But they made it work for a year. I give them a lot of credit for how maturely they handled it. She's an old soul, but a happy one.

    But if you ask her, her friendships are solid, they just aren't "typical". She wishes that the friends she has connected with on a lifetime friend basis, lived closer, but thanks to technology, she has these relationships! One of her best friends lives in NJ and he is coming here this weekend, and it's all she has talked about for weeks. I'm beyond excited for her that she will get to have that time, and even compete against him Saturday. They are competitors but the best of friends. It's really neat. I learn a lot from her, daily!

    I hope you enjoyed your dinner with Bailey last night and thank you for sharing the pictures.

    Happy Birthday to your Dad today and I hope you have a good day.

    God bless...

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  5. I am enjoying getting to know Chris each day! He sounds like such a wonderful kid that everyone loved and enjoyed having around! Thank you for sharing. Your words and the love you have for Chris is a bright spot in my day! Each day I am more and more amazed by your strength!! I am smiling! Thank you, Regina!

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  6. Hi Regina,

    What great pics. I really enjoy them! My son won't let me take pictures of him. He always turns away. I think he has low self esteem and I can't figure out how to improve it. I drove by Shen yesterday and of course thought of you and Chris. I hope you enjoyed your dinner. Keep writing!

    Hugs, Ann

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  7. Regina,

    Loved today's post and learning another piece of the story of Chris. Loved the pictures you shared. I recognize some Shaker kids my sons, Connor and Jeffrey, know too. My boys give me a hard time about taking their pictures but as long as I don't tag them on facebook I think they are secretly okay with it!

    I hope more people will share stories and pictures with you. Hoping you and Bailey enjoy you dinner tonight.

    Thanks for sharing.
    Hugs and peace.

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  8. I love the pictures!! Chris seemed like a mother's dream son. I hope my boys grow to be like Chris.

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