Yes, it's me, sorry I haven't
blogged in a while. I was fortunate
enough this past week to take an unexpected trip to California and accompany
Bailey to the set of the television taping of "Splash."
If
you've never heard of it, this is its first season on American TV and it
spotlights a cast of celebrities who learn how to dive (even off the four
story,10 meter, platform) and they are judged on their performance and
technique with one celebrity being eliminated each week.
Through the power of social media
and persistence by a friend of the Wind family, we were offered entry tickets
to the taping of the season finale. This was very exciting to hear!
It was unexpected but very welcomed news because, Olympic diver, Greg Louganis
happens to be one of Bailey's idols and he also coaches the celebrity divers! It seemed perfect news to hear because Bailey
is struggling to get back on the board and we all know she has tremendous
promise and talent to share with us. She needs that one karate chop to get her
confidence back in gear.
Personally, I felt that if we could
get Bailey in front of Greg he might be the inspiration needed to re-motivate her.
Little did I know about all the people we were going to meet. I
couldn't have asked for a more wonderful trip full of kind, caring individuals.
Let me share some of the incredible moments...
The day before the show was taped we
were invited by Greg to spend the day at the practice pool with the
celebrities as they each trained with a personal diving coach. How would
we have ever known that three past Olympic diving coaches were on sight all
day! Bailey had the opportunity to talk with them, seek advice, learn
some motivational visual techniques and assist them as they worked with the celebrities.
All three know Baileys future coach, Dave Parrington, in Tennessee.
Seems the diving world is a small one at this elite stage.
Bailey also got to meet most all of
the celebrities and they shared with her how they overcame their fears about
getting on the diving boards and platforms to perform their dives. As
most all of us can agree, there's no way we would ever consider diving from
four stories up. We would need to be
pushed probably - if we even ever agreed to climb the stairs!!! These celebrities
have never taken a real dive in their lives and really worked hard trying their
best. They practiced on trampolines and with harnesses around their
waists to learn the skills. All I did was sit by the poolside watching
with Bailey's mom and her Aunt Donielle yet looking up at the 10 meter platform
was beyond intimidating. I had a pit in my stomach each time someone stood
at the top and that was before they even dove or jumped!
I can say, whole heartedly, the day
spent at the practice pool was among the most promising days I've experienced
since Chris passed. My personal goal for this trip was not in meeting
celebrities, it was gleaning as much time and advice from those who could
motivate Bailey to stay on course with her diving career and college plans at
the U of TN. That is something I, unfortunately, cannot help her with.
All I can do is remind her she CAN do it and Chris wants her to stay on
track!! I KNOW he wants to watch her from above as she excels and nails
this sport. For me, I take satisfaction in knowing I have done my best to
do what I can for Bailey but the frustration comes in knowing I have to work
within the boundaries of things I can control. I cannot bring her
boyfriend Chris back. I cannot bring her best friend Deanna back.
I CAN reach out to anyone and everyone within my grasp to ask for help.
Together we are a powerhouse. I know this because I have
experienced it. Every one of you has given me virtual hugs and words of
wisdom to help me and I will do the same for Bailey and for others.
I know the power of prayer. It
works. I've gotten through close to five months now because of the
prayers and sense of community I have been blessed with. I know working
as a team and conquering fears is more powerful than ever trying to go it
alone. People want to help, there's satisfaction and good feeling in
assisting others. Plus there is that one other thing that I am reminded
of daily; it's NOT my time to go, nor is it yours! God doesn't want me or
you yet and so we need to do our best with the hand we now hold. There's
room for improvement for all of us, even just the slightest touch.
In this instance, I can't say what
will come of Bailey's future because that is up to her. I know I will
continue to pray with all my might that she follow the path she laid out
for herself before this accident occurred. I don't want the accident to
sideline her. I want it to inspire her. It has its place in her
life and her world but it doesn't have to hold her back. In fact I
believe it will make her stronger. Her life story can either collapse or
flourish. I prefer flourishing! Good needs to come of this tragedy
and nothing would make me prouder than to watch her excel and overcome.
My son dated a winner.
I know Christopher is right there agreeing
with me, and probably yelling at her to get up and get on with things.
She has too much potential to cave in. It would be a waste of
diving talent but more so a waste of a love of life. Bailey is full
of goodness and it needs to be shared. I pray it happens and I'm doing my
part to push for it.
Look up some of these names if you
want to see the incredible talent we were fortunate to spend the day with: Greg
Louganis, David Boudia, Steve Foley, Wendy Lerew, Scott
Reich ,Cassidy Krug, Nicole Eggert, Drake Bell, Rory Bushfield, Hank
Baskett and Pat McAffee.
Who knew I would meet an
Indianapolis Colt and a Philadelphia Eagle at a diving practice???? My
son loved NFL football and the Eagles were his favorite team. Nobody
needs to tell me God works in mysterious ways! Hank and Pat were very important
s parts of my trip and I will add they were two of the nicest people I had
conversations with. I know I'm blessed as I found inspiration on this
trip too! I was going for support purposes and reaped an unplanned reward
myself.
May I also add that my desire for
Bailey to get back into the swing of life is not solely aimed at her. It
is directed at each one of us. These sorts of tragedies can derail all of
us in many ways, even those who didn't know the kids. I beg each one of
you to learn that good outweighs bad all the time. Grieve and be sad for
any of your problems but know enough to realize you can't let it stall you.
I'm thankful to be able to grab myself (when I'm low) and realize that
Chris wouldn't want me to stay there. What is the benefit? There
isn't one. It becomes selfish when it goes beyond sadness to
debilitating. When life is so gloomy there seems no point. I feel
fortunate to say I don't feel like this, but I see some who do right now and
it's frustrating. I have the heaviest heart every single day and I miss
my son so desperately. Some days it feels as though my heart is going to leap
straight out of my chest, through my skin and bones, hit the ground and stop
beating. It's not going to happen, that's irrational, but I do think it.
On the flip side though, I have also been blessed with two of God's
greatest creations - my boys! I held and nurtured one for seventeen years
and he was a treasure. I have memories galore and pictures to remind me
and love in my heart that runs deep. (I think I'll keep my heart inside my
chest cavity for now thanks). My remaining son is still here before my
eyes and I adore him. God is granting me the opportunity to watch him
flourish and grow and I am so thankful. I will continue to do for Jeremy
all the things I can and I pray to sit at his college graduation next year as
he crosses the stage in person for his diploma. I pray to see him though
medical school and move on to his professional career and enjoy a personal life
that fulfills him and brings him tremendous joy. I have much to look
forward to, as do you!
Please make the most of your days,
your experiences and your life. It passes quickly. Make it count!
Let me take just a moment to thank
my high school classmates and alumnae from The Academy of the Holy Names.
They sent me on this trip!!! None
of this past week’s events were gifted to us. The offer of entry to the
show was the only certainty (which was free to everyone fortunate enough to get
in and we were guests of Greg Louganis). My high school was behind me
financially to make this happen. I so appreciate the opportunity to
escort Bailey and witness her conversations with the trainers and see her
smile. I was dragged to the Hollywood walk of fame and through the fancy
homes in Beverly Hills just for fun. I couldn't have asked for a nicer few days
away knowing my son was happy I accompanied her. I could feel his
presence daily and it made my heart happy. I felt like I was doing
something to help as Bailey navigates her new life. My heartfelt thanks
to all my AHN classmates for your generosity. You did good ladies!!!
Here's hoping each of you has
the insight to recognize you have two ways to go in the face of a problem;
you can collapse and fall or you can dig deep, find strength and push forward.
I pray you find strength. You only need the tiniest tidbit to get
started, those around you will pull you the rest of the way. I've
experienced it and I recommend it. Please, please, please dig deep, don't
give up!
Thank you for reading.